I’m live right now, over at the Cripplegate.  I’m responding to a blog post by Justin Taylor where he takes a stab at the idea of a pre-tribulational rapture (He’s a post-trib guy himself).  It’s not much but it’s what I’ve written recently and it may be helpful to some to see a response to what are portrayed as “obvious” arguments against pre-tribulationalism by someone who’s a lot more of a significant personality in Evangelicalism than I am.

I know many of my readers may not know who Justin Taylor is (he’s the senior VP of Crossway publishing and has a rather significant blog in Evangelical circles), or may not care much about end times theology debates, but I was asked to write a response to him and I did…and I’m sharing that with y’all.  I’m guessing nobody’s going to notice my response, but whatever.  For the few dozen people that it helps, it’s worth it.

Off to bed!

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “the fly in the ointment” Unger

It’s been a while since I made my health struggles known.  I first announced my struggles with Hepatitis, then gave an update, and another, and another.  In this whole process, the updates have not come quickly or frequently simply because this has been a symphony of confusion and a rather gigantic waiting game.  I’ll give an update as best I can for everyone (knowing that some of you are probably wondering what in the world has happened to me):

1.  Praise the Lord I’m feeling better.  My energy levels are returning and my jaundice is visually gone (meaning I’m no longer yellow).  I’m not having as much trouble sleeping as I did before and the one drug I’m on has kept my body from retaining much water (i.e. I still have ankles).  I’m able to eat without struggle now (my nausea has subsided for the most part) and I’m generally bouncing back.

The Lord has been good; my liver clearly isn’t failing and I’m physically not as bad as I definitely could be.

2.  I’m feeling better but my doctor is still watching my blood work numbers, meaning that my blood work is the judge of whether I’m actually doing better.  My bilirubin levels are still dropping, but I’m not at the level I need to be in order to get on my next round of treatment.  Please pray for me; pray that my blood work gets to where the numbers need to be and pray that I don’t have another “incident” (i.e. get a secondary infection) that basically does this:

3.  I’m hopefully a month away from starting my next round of treatment, and I’m still uncertain if the whole regime of treatment will be covered.  I’ve got different answers from everyone I talk to and nobody will give me anything in writing except for highly cryptic letters chalked full of caveats.  The drugs will cost around $90,000 and I may have $50,000 of coverage from my health insurance provider or I may have $1,000,000 worth of coverage: I’ve been told both answers.  Obviously, getting half way through the treatment and being asked to cough up the money for the other half will be rather inconvenient.  Please pray that everything comes through with my health insurance and there are no surprises.

4.  Also, please pray for my wife.  Jennifer has been having a rather hard go of things for the past 2 years, and these last 3 months have been overly hard on her.  She’s had to endure so terribly much with me and our 2 kids (including the birth of our second), and I’ve not been much of a help for around half that time (as I’ve been quite “not-myself” for around 12 months of that time).  She’s been having trouble sleeping, having trouble finding energy to do things and having trouble dealing with all the various challenges each day brings her.  I am so thankful for her and will ask you to remember her (and our two kids) in your prayers.  In being sick for the last 2 years and this whole situation hasn’t exactly been an easy one for her to bear…

My most sincere thanks go out to all the thousands of people, all over the world, that I’ve learned are praying for us.  Your prayers have been certainly felt in our home and we covet them greatly over this final stretch.

I’m going to sign off now and go play with my son (and keep him quiet) while Jen and our little daughter both have a much-needed nap.

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “keep on keeping on” Unger

I’ve been taking a rest from blogging as of recent (well, this whole past month), mostly because my week has been entirely swallowed up by my weekly preparation of a class I’ve been teaching on Bible study and preparing a Bible lesson/sermon.  As happens in the process of studying, I always stumble across various tidbits and details that get tossed in my drafts folder, awaiting to be made posts some day.  I thought I’d quickly share one that struck me as quite interesting.

I was going through a bunch of scriptures and ended up in Acts 19.  There, in Acts 19, we see this following passage:

¹¹ And God was doing extraordinary miracles by the hands of Paul, ¹² so that even handkerchiefs or aprons that had touched his skin were carried away to the sick, and their diseases left them and the evil spirits came out of them. ¹³ Then some of the itinerant Jewish exorcists undertook to invoke the name of the Lord Jesus over those who had evil spirits, saying, “I adjure you by the Jesus whom Paul proclaims.” ¹⁴ Seven sons of a Jewish high priest named Sceva were doing this. ¹⁵ But the evil spirit answered them, “Jesus I know, and Paul I recognize, but who are you?” ¹⁶ And the man in whom was the evil spirit leaped on them, mastered all of them and overpowered them, so that they fled out of that house naked and wounded. ¹⁷ And this became known to all the residents of Ephesus, both Jews and Greeks. And fear fell upon them all, and the name of the Lord Jesus was extolled. ¹⁸ Also many of those who were now believers came, confessing and divulging their practices. ¹⁹ And a number of those who had practiced magic arts brought their books together and burned them in the sight of all. And they counted the value of them and found it came to fifty thousand pieces of silver. ²⁰ So the word of the Lord continued to increase and prevail mightily. – Acts 19:11-20

In 19:13, I saw the word “exorcists” and started wondering about what exactly the Bible said about exorcism…so I looked up the term.

Here’s what I learned:

I was somewhat surprised to find that the term exorkistēs only occurs in Acts 19:13.  It’s a hapax legomenon; a word that only appears once in the New Testament…and in the one place it appears it’s used for those who have seen how the apostles cast out demons and attempted to do so fraudulently.  Now that is interesting to me.

What else is interesting is that exorkistēs is the noun form of the verb exorkizō, which also appears only once in the New Testament; Matthew 26:63:

“But Jesus remained silent. And the high priest said to him, ‘I adjure you by the living God, tell us if you are the Christ, the Son of God.'”

The high priest attempted to command Jesus to tell him whether or not he was the messiah.  The term exorcist has the idea of “commanding”, and comes from a verb that essentially means “command”.  In Matthew 26:63 the verb is what an angry high priest does to attempt to get Jesus to condemn himself by saying the specific phrase, and in Acts 19:13 the noun is used of seven fellows who confused the power of God with magic and attempted to turn the name of Jesus into an incantation.

So, the Bible does mention exorcism (specifically the term), but in the one time it uses the term it says nothing positive.

This isn’t meant to even attempt to address the issue of demonic possession, or deliverance “ministries”, or spiritual warfare, or anything of the sort.  I’m only examining the word and looking at how it is used in scripture.

Now, excuse me as my coffee-break from class-prep is over and I return to work!

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “Don’t call yourself an exorcist…ever!” Unger

I’ve been thinking of upgrading my wordpress.com blog to my own dot com site, and I’ve been also thinking about some merchandise ideas as of late as it would be fantastic to turn this blog into some sort of (tiny) source of income.  I am not any sort of graphic designer, but I do have one or two creative bones in my body.  I was just showering and had a brainwave.  I was thinking of designing a shirt (which means “getting someone to design”) that looked something like this:

I’m guessing that I’d sell about three, but that’s probably somewhere around a big fat $6 of income!

Okay…I’m actually somewhat joking.  I don’t really plan on selling T-shirts just yet…

…but in around a week I will start working on editing the review of Authentic Fire by Dr. Michael Brown that Fred Butler and I have posted, in a refined form, on the Cripplegate.  It’s going to become an e-book and I’ll try to add a bunch of new content to it that should be even more helpful than it’s already been, as well as try to make it available sometime before American Thanksgiving to be a general resource on cessationism.  It will be something that we’ll charge money for, but the cost will be in the low single-digit range (I don’t know exactly how much yet).

I plan to write something else on cessationism as well, namely a comprehensive defense of Cessationism consisting of an exegetical take on all the major passages as well as a biblical exploration of all the associated topics, but that will likely be much more in the future and will take far more time!

Just two piece of merchandise news that may be of interest to some.

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “I love pickles too” Unger

I’ve heard about the movie God’s Not Dead before it hit theaters, and I refused to see it…mostly because when it was in the theater I was yellow and wondering if I was going into liver failure.

Now that it’s on DVD, I’ve seen it and have written an Amazon review (feel free to go here and give me positive votes).

Seeing that I’m doing next to no blogging these days, I’m basically double-dipping into other things I write and will toss a few things up here from time to time.  My main efforts these days are book editing and learning how to publish an e-book (and there’s a lot to do and learn).

Still, here’s my review for those that are interested:

God’s Not Dead is a “Christian” fantasy film for youth group kids…

…but that’s mostly because the Christianity in this movie is the “Cultural Christianity” of youth groups and Christian rock bands.

In other words, not really the Christianity as revealed by God in the Christian scriptures.

*Sigh*.

So, the basic story is that a Christian freshman takes an intro philosophy course at university and has a professor who is a raging atheist.

No news there; been there and done that (as have thousands of other Christians who’ve attended university).  The professor agrees to allow the Christian to defend the existence of God, gives him 3 classes to present his case (for around 20 minutes a class) and then allows all the students to decide the victor.  The student gives arguments that weren’t great, and if you know anything about apologetics (or especially presuppositional apologetics), you’ll find this part to be quite unconvincing…though it’s not surprising that a freshman university student basically quotes popular apologists like Lennox and Strobel (as if any atheist gives them credibility at all), goes off about free will and how God’s over-riding moral quality is that he loves you like a teenage girl…

His professor eventually cannot overcome the student’s unassailable arguments which leads to a break down where he screams and reveals his angry heart to the student.  I guess that’s the way many high school students think these debates actually turn out if you just skillfully apply some bumper-sticker truths, but North America is full of “ex-Christians” who bear testimony to how well bumper-sticker theology stands up to rational scrutiny.

Sadly, most atheists with terminal degrees are in a completely different category than Sorbo’s character…and not all of them believe in free will (which basically de-fangs 95% of popular-level Christian apologetics).  Still, it’s a movie and serious atheist arguments make for boring cinema, so I guess that’s understood.

*Spoiler alert*

You’ll get all warm and fuzzy when the atheist professor is hit by a car on the way to a Newsboys concert at the end and makes a “deathbed conversion”, just so everything is nicely wrapped up (which always happens, right?).

Wait.

Going to a Newsboys concert?

Well, that’s apparently what a PhD philosophy professor does when they’re ready to “get back to God”.

No prayer or repentance.

No convictions from the scripture.

Just get your coat and run to a Christian rock concert.

Again, this movie is clearly aimed at ill-informed youth group kids who wouldn’t know any better.

The REALLY horrible part was that the atheist professor is dating a “Christian” girl who’s one of his ex-students, and her pastor knows about it but apparently doesn’t care that they’re likely shacked-up (which the movie doesn’t explicitly show even though the girl herself comments on how she feels guilty that they’re “unequally yoked” and they’re unbelievers in the 21st century).  The pastor is confused about the gospel, doesn’t care about his congregants living in blatant sin, and is alarmingly shallow (i.e. he laments that, unlike a missionary, he’s not doing “real” ministry…).

Again, I’ll chalk this up to the fact that this is aimed at youth group kids, and we don’t expect much from youth group kids, right?

Yikes.

There’s a third and fourth story line; a Muslim girl is a secret Christian who gets discovered and is kicked out of her house but somehow recovers alarmingly quickly; enough to get to a Newsboys concert as well (I sense a theme here…).  There’s also an aggressive atheist blogger who mocks a guy from Duck Dynasty, gets cancer (and dumped by her “rich and greasy” boyfriend), and then gets “led to the Lord” (which means “vague theism”) by Newsboys with a gospel that I don’t recognize at all and can’t seem to find in the scriptures.  Apparently, Christianity basically revolves around the Christian rock concerts and knowing that God loves you super much because you’re super awesome.

This whole movie is clearly aimed at ill-informed youth group kids: it’s kitschy, shallow and doesn’t dive into any of the serious questions with any sort of serious approach…which makes sense given the target audience.  But the theology is horrible, the pastor is incompetent, and the whole “Christianity” is nothing short of the “cultural Christianity” that is a theological plague in the evangelical world.

Movies like this make Christianity look actually irrational and do more damage than the atheists whom these movies are supposed to combat.  It may encourage ill-informed teenage believers who are scared of going to university, but it does so by giving them false and shallow hope, based on frightfully unbiblical and shallow theology, to prepare for the onslaught that most secular universities have in store.

This movie also doesn’t prove that God’s not dead.

It just proves that cultural Christianity sells to people who’ve already drank the Kool-Aid.

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “Kool-Aid has no place in church” Unger

Did Charisma let some ranting “prophet” share their latest divine revelation, or post an article promoting a heresy condemned by an early church ecumenical council?

Well, probably…but that’s not exactly news.

What Charisma did do was allow noted cessationist and biblical exegete, Dr. Albert Mohler, to post an article on their website that goes after Joel & Victoria Osteen for their prosperity gospel theology.

No, I’m serious.

Yup.

That about sums it up.

Letting a cessationist and orthodox evangelical biblical scholar (who understands the gospel with a level of clarity that necessarily excludes competing “gospels”) post an article on Charisma has not only proved to be a meltdown, but has caused no small amount of gunfire in the comment thread.

A rather alarming amount of people have shown up and pulled the trigger, condemning Dr. Mohler and supporting the Osteens as champions of gospel fidelity and orthodoxy.  That’s not exactly the trigger a person should be pulling…

You think I’m overstating things?

Go check out the comments.  I tossed the link up on Facebook today and described the Charisma post as “The entire Strange Fire conference validated in 1 post and its comment thread”.

I dare suggest that the comment thread indeed does verify a whole lot of the criticisms laid out in the Strange Fire conference.  Who would have thought that so many people would show up to unashamedly defend the prosperity gospel?  Where exactly did they all learn that?  In their prosperity gospel preaching churches maybe?

Didn’t Dr. Craig Keener say that he didn’t write a book condemning the prosperity gospel because “no one believes in prosperity teaching anymore”?Someone should tell the folks over at Charisma.

Time to get my daughter up from her nap, so that marks the end of this short post.

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Until Next Time,

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 Lyndon “Did they REALLY say that?” Unger

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P.S. – Yes.  Seeing that Dr. Mohler’s article was in partial response to Victoria Osteen’s comments that worship is all about you, someone on Charisma actually said “The Osteens and their church are doing all they can for the Glory of God. They hear from God like you and me. They answer to God like you and me. If God was offended about what she said, I think He would let her know.”

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What can a person possibly say in response to that?

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…to see if I can edit and post photos from the android application. But, I’ll double dip a bit.  A few weeks ago I was in a thrift store and saw this:

And then, out of curiosity I cracked it open and saw this:

That’s right.  Sandwiched between noted exegetical howitzers Pat Robertson and Paul Crouch is Tim Lahaye, who endorses the book alongside those two noted biblical scholars.  Dr. Lahaye calls Benny Hinn “a student of Bible prophecy” and says his book is a “must read”.  I did not know they were friends.  I now regret never reading a single page of the Left Behind series even less.

Yikes. Benny Hinn. What is it with that guy getting endorsed by people who should certainly know better?

And thus concludes my test post. Wife, you can apparently edit and post photos from the Android application.

Everyone else; this entire post was written with my right pointer finger. I don’t want to make this a habit. All that poke and peck typing makes a finger go ouchie.

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “I heart my keyboard” Unger

PS – did I say “howitzers”?  I meant “nose flutes”.

*Update for Sept 26th* – Seeing that I’ve got similar feedback as the first comment in the thread, I’ve updated/edited this post to make it stronger.

Dear Sir/Madam,

On behalf of your adopted family (namely all Christians worldwide), welcome to the family!  We rejoice, along with Heaven (Luke 15:7), that you’ve come to recognize the fact that you’ve previously lived a life of moral rebellion against God (i.e. “sin”) in thought and deed, renounced and turned from your previous life of sin, called out to Jesus to provide the righteousness you lack and save you from the coming and just wrath of God upon the sinful world, and are now trusting in the person and work of Christ to save you from your enslavement to sin, the coming consequences, impute his own righteousness to you and one day, raise you from the dead into a body fit to live forever more on paradise earth with the Trinity and all redeemed and resurrected believers.

We know you are excited about finding Jesus and coming to faith, and many of us remember the joy and excitement of when we “came to our senses” about ourselves, the Bible, Jesus and the gospel.  The time you’re in now is one of many delights, and we wish you God’s best in dealing with all the various challenges you’ll face.  We hope we can be a helpful resource to help you learn and grow and would love to see you both happy and holy for the rest of your life.

All that being said, we’d like to give you three warnings:

1.  Plug into a local church.  Now that you’re a believer, you’re part of the Body of Christ (1 Cor. 12:12-13; Col. 1:18-20) and as part of the Body of Christ, are inescapably connected to other believers (Rom. 12:3-5).  You need to find a local expression of that body; a local church, where you can learn to serve fellow Christians and learn to enact all the various qualities of Christian character (i.e. Rom. 12:9-21).  You also need to obey Christ’s command to be baptized (Matt. 28:19), which is both a step that should follow confession of faith (Acts 8:36-38) and is a ceremony in which you publicly identify with Christ in his death and resurrection (Rom. 6:3-11).  This should be done in a local church where you can have pastors over you who can care for you (Heb. 13:7; 1 Pet. 5:1-4) and under whom you can learn the virtue of submission/humility (Heb. 13:17; 1 Pet. 5:5), an essential for any Christian (Phil. 2:1-11).  To cut yourself off from being part of the regular life of the church is to intentionally and horrifically stunt your spiritual growth.

2.  Take Time to Grow.  You used to have an opinion that was widely heard because of your media exposure and celebrity status, and that hasn’t changed…but the expectations of you have really changed.  We love and embrace you, but you need to understand that you now answer to God and he will hold you to account for all the careless words you say (Matthew 12:36-37).  Your careless words are heard, and heeded, by a whole lot of people because of who you are and the exposure you get, so you really need to learn to guard your tongue (James 1:26).  In addition to that, the Bible gives warnings about the dangers of being in a position of spiritual influence while still being a new convert (1 Timothy 3:7) and also talks about how Christian leaders will be judged by the absolute highest standards (James 3:1-2).  We’d love to try to look out for you and help protect your from pride and you own horribly dangerous tongue (James 3:3-11).  Please take a decade or so to learn and grow your biblical knowledge and moral character before you start tossing your two cents worth into theological debates on topics that you have known about for a relatively short time.  Please take time to learn to be humble and serve people; those are rather important virtues in your new-found faith (Psalm 147:6; Proverbs 3:33-34; Matthew 18:4, 20:26).  Some of us would love to help; just ask and we’d be delighted to help you sort out truth from fiction with regards to some of the new ideas that you’re learning about (like eschatology, supersessionism, textual criticism and Bible translations, blood moons, social justice, church history, etc.).

3.  Watch Out for the Wolves.  There are a whole lot of people in Christianity that will want to take advantage of you.  They will want to utilize your fame to further their own.  They will want to be seen as your mentor.  They will want you to be in their movies, or endorse their books, or be on their radio programs.  They will want pictures of themselves with you (preferably hanging out and looking cool) that they can share on Twitter.  They might call themselves “prophets” or “apostles” and will tend to be obsessed with certain issues (like some of the “new idea” issues I previously listed).  They will try to get you to jump on their bandwagons…and you most likely will be really tempted to do so because, to be honest with you, you’re really easy for certain people to manipulate.  I know you don’t think you are, but you need to understand that almost everyone is.  Some of those people who try to manipulate you (not all) are what the Bible calls “false teachers”; they look really spiritual and sound really convincing but they’re actually frauds (the Bible refers to them as “wolves” that hide out around the sheep – Matthew 7:15; Acts 20:29-30).  They also have a strange way of convincing really smart people of really bizarre ideas because false teachers have demonic power behind them and their ideas (1 Timothy 4:1, 2 Thessalonians 2:9-12).  Don’t be frightened though; if you are patient and take time, study your Bible (and both ask the Lord for understanding and avail yourself to the pastor & other online resources you have available), and evaluate what everyone says against the Bible, you will find the truth being revealed (Isaiah 8:11-20; Acts 17:10-11).  As you’re sorting through all the various ideas that come your way, stick as close as you can to  the teaching of the Bible and listen to the guys who consistently explain the Bible reasonably and base their teaching and beliefs on the Bible alone (not their own experiences, dreams, visions, or claims of “hearing the voice of God”).

We have all started as confused and gullible spiritual babies.  We have all bought into bad ideas (for a time).  Many of us have grown, and some of us have grown up quite a bit.  You can certainly do the same.

I hope this helps you, at least a little.

I’d love to recommend some folks for you to learn from as well, like Albert Mohler, John MacArthur, James White, and Phil Johnson, just to get you started.  Those are some guys who have well-established track records of taking God and the Bible really seriously, and they have a whole lot of teaching/resources online that can help you.  They’re all well studied men who, though they disagree on various issues (and that’s okay), will help you learn a whole lot more about Christ, the gospel, the Bible and serving the Lord.  As well, they’re guys who you’ll find consistently giving solid and biblical answers to the hard questions that you’ll be running across when you encounter the tsunami of no-so-well-studied Christians and Christian leaders/pastors who are all over the place.

There’s a whole lot more I’d love to say, but I don’t want to overwhelm you.

May the Lord bless you abundantly and protect you from everyone who would want to use and abuse you,

Lyndon Unger

P.S. – I’d love to avail myself to you as well, but I’m under no delusions about whether any celebrity converts will actually find and read this open letter…or care what I have to say.  This is mainly a somewhat constructive way of my expressing my vast frustration at this idiocy, among other things.

On December 31, 1995 something momentous happened.  Tim Lahaye and Jerry Jenkins released the book Left Behind, a fictional account of their (somewhat fanciful) ideas of what the rapture would be like, as well as the 7 years of tribulation that followed.  The book spawned a series that would ultimately involve 16 novels and would sell 65+ million copies.  Many people read the books, many people hated the books, and the whole series became both a topic of continual conversation/embarrassment as well as the reason for rejecting various points of end times theology (properly known as eschatology) for the next 20 years (if I had a dime for every time I found myself in a conversation about eschatology where someone brought up a series of fiction books as the main reason for rejecting Biblical doctrine…).  But that wasn’t the end of it all.  On October 31st, 2000, the Left Behind series hit the big time when it (*gasp*) became a movie.  Not only did it become a movie, but it was a movie that starred Kirk Cameron (the greatest Christian celebrity ever)…

…as well as that guy from Die Hard and Walker, Texas Ranger.

This was one of the first “big budget” Christian films ever ($4 million), and I’ll never forget seeing my first “Christian” movie: shock.  Shock that people on my TV were talking about Jesus in a way that wasn’t utterly idiotic or revealing a writer who apparently slept through every post-flannel board lesson in Sunday School.  I was weirded out, but mostly because I wasn’t used to seeing Christians act like Christians on my TV.  It was obvious that this was no Hollywood production but was still something I was not used to seeing, and that “newness” factor was likely what gripped me the most about the movie.

Now that Hollywood has basically remade everything that was ever any good, they’ve remade Left Behind too.  This time, it was staring Nicolas Cage rather than Kirk Cameron, and the budget is way more ($16 million).  Tonight, on opening night, I sat through the remake.

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I’ve got a lot of negative things I could say about the movie, but I’ll try to explain my dislike for the movie in a few simple statements:

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A.  It has nothing to do with Christianity.

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Now I’m not being nitpicky or taking apart the bad theology that surfaces in the movie (though there was lots).  What I mean is that this movie doesn’t actually portray Christians or Christianity, but rather Americana Religiosity.  I’m talking about the cultural Christianity that one finds in large swaths of the American South where “being American” is somehow related to “being Christian”.  A big part of the reason I say that is because throughout the entire movie, nobody even mentions Jesus Christ at all.

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No kidding.  He doesn’t make an appearance in a single conversation.

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People talk vaguely about “God”, and the “need to believe”, but nobody talks about Christ.

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Nobody mentions him.

Now I’m not complaining because people don’t talk about the things I want them to talk about.  If people would have said “Jesus” a few times in the movie, that wouldn’t have fixed things.

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The real problem wasn’t that Christ was not mentioned, but rather that nobody shows any understanding about him whatsoever and people somehow “get right with God” in the movie without Christ or the gospel being a part of it.  The “good news” in Christianity is “good news” about Jesus.  The “message” of Christianity is, at it’s essential and uncompromisable core, about Jesus Christ.

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If you remove Jesus Christ from Christianity, you don’t have Christianity.  It’s that simple.

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B. It wants nothing to do with Christianity.

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Before the rapture, all the Christians in the movie are either actually annoying/crazy.  That describes the woman at the airport.  She runs up to Buck, mentions how he’s seen lots of earthquakes, refers to Matt. 24:7 and then asks him if he thinks they’re in the “end times”.   Other are simply annoyingly stupid.  That describes Irene Steele (Ray’s wife).  She talks to Chloe about the end times because she wants Chloe “to be ready”, but apparently never mentions Jesus. She apparently doesn’t understand that “being ready” means “knowing Christ” rather than “knowing disassociated and random facts about the end times but remaining unregenerate”.  The New Testament constantly and continually makes this point, basically every time there’s eschatological talk (i.e. Matt. 25, 1 Peter 3, etc.).  The only thing a person needs to “be ready” is to believe the gospel.

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I definitely wanted to scream when I watched the Irene/Chloe conversation.

The movie portrays Christians in what I’d consider a consistently negative light (i.e. the problem of evil is “solved” when Buck talks to Chloe about suffering and says “if you look hard enough, you’ll see whatever it is you’re looking for”), gives no explanation of the events in the movie (the confusion is never really resolved beyond suggesting that the missing people are “in heaven”), and is actually a movie that is more of a plane crash thriller than any sort of “Christian” movie at all…assuming that a “Christian” movie has some sort of vague purpose that involves presenting the message of Christianity in some way (which this movie absolutely wants nothing to do with).

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In this respect, the original Left Behind was an unbelievably better movie.

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C.  It shows no understanding of Christianity.

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This part was the worst.  It’s like people in Hollywood don’t have a clue about evangelical Christianity but are intentionally not facing that obvious fact.  If you want to make a movie and get millions of Christians to pay $15 to see it, you need to show that you understand Christianity (at least a bit).  Points A and B are the main illustrations here.

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Let’s be serious here: “Christian” movies aren’t aimed at the liberals.  They’re already watching all the garbage that Hollywood puts out and Hollywood could make a musical out of First Blood and some self-professing “Christians” would make an argument that Rambo is “really” a sort of Christ figure and the movie has a veiled Christian message (I mean, the movie has “blood” in the title; it’s obvious, right?).  Christian movies are aimed at the conservative evangelicals that make up the only growing segment of Christianity in North America, but Hollywood doesn’t understand conservative evangelicals at all.  All Hollywood seems to do is either make fun of us or show that they don’t have a clue about conservative evangelicalism (and don’t really care about learning).

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We don’t like being mocked.

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We don’t like being misrepresented.

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We take our Christianity seriously and don’t recognize the version of us that Hollywood tries to sell us.

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We are the ones who do apologetics.

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We are the ones who do evangelism.

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We take the Bible seriously and make a habit of attempting to know it beyond a surface level.

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We are the ones who are still interested in theology and buy 1,200 page books on the subject.

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Essentially, Hollywood shows no interest in understanding us but also wants our money.

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One of those things has to change.

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4.  Various rambling thoughts:

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- The humor in the movie was totally stupid.  The movie made fun of an old lady with alzheimers, a Muslim, and had a series of midget jokes that climaxed with the Muslim kicking the midget down the emergency plane ramp.  It was painful.  No clever dialogue humor, no witty visuals, etc.  Just slapstick mockery of short people, old people and Muslims.

 .

-  The whole looting spree that started within seconds of the rapture was absolutely hilarious.  I mean honestly.  If a bunch of people around you in a mall vanish into thin air, is your immediate reaction to kick in the display window at Best Buy and steal a TV?  Is that anyone’s immediate reaction?

 .

-  I was laughing at several things in the movie that were not intentional jokes or were totally missed opportunities at jokes.

 .

- For example, the airline was “PCA Airlines”.  Seeing that this was a movie about a pretribulational rapture, I found it rather funny that the name of the airline was coincidentally PCA; those folks definitely deny the pretrib rapture.  I kept waiting for some tearful Presbyterian to recognize that they were unbelievers and then attempt to soften the moment by making a joke about a “mid-millennial rapture” or something (though truthfully, I thought it would be funnier if some PCUSA Amil/Postmil clergywoman would have been on there fighting with the people on the plane about how it couldn’t have been the rapture since “the Bible never mentions the rapture” and “revelation is a book of symbols and metaphors”.  I would pay $500 to see that).

 .

- Another thing that made me laugh was how Irene Steele’s pastor was Left Behind, as was Chloe, but nobody else showed up at the church.  Apparently her unregenerate pastor shepherded an entire church of believers…yup.  I’ll buy that for a dollar.

 .

- One totally missed joke was that Chloe could have walked by an Episcopal Church that was setting up an emergency shelter in their gym with their church sign reading “we’re here throughout this period of tribulation to help”.  Completely missed comedy gold.

 .

-  Another missed joke was that they could have had Joel Osteen (or a look-alike “celebrity pastor”) on CNN giving a “pastor’s perspective” on speculations about whether this disappearance was something to do with “a thing mentioned in the Bible”, to which he could have said “well, I don’t know about that but I know that God loves each and every one of you and wants to turn your pain into your prosperity!” and then tried to sell his latest book “God’s your biggest fan”.  Completely missed comedy gold.

 .

-  For that matter, they could have had a great clip of somebody on TBN offering its explanation of why TBN is still on the air at all.

 .

Talk about missed jokes.  Feel free to toss out more in the comment thread.  I have a few that I’ll save for the comments as well.

 .

So, that basically sums up all that I’ve got to say.  I could go into detail about how the movie misrepresented this or that specific point of theology, or offered my own ill-informed critique of something involving production or special effects, but really I would suggest that if the movie doesn’t offer any understanding or hope or gospel that involves Jesus, it doesn’t really have any value as “Christian” film.  It’s vaguely religious film that doesn’t understand its subject matter.

Feel free to see it, but don’t say I didn’t warn you.  There isn’t any serious swearing (one “s-word” that I remember) and there’s obviously no sex scenes or nudity or anything, so it’s at least a relatively clean movie that you can see with someone.  At least that is worth something.

.

If you’re like me though, you will either be really annoyed by it or will find yourself providing color commentary and making all the theological jokes that they missed…

 .

Until Next Time,

 .

Lyndon “I endure this stuff so you don’t have to” Unger

What a change happens in 2 years.  It was 2 years ago this month that I found myself in a hospital bed, wondering how I was going to tell my newly pregnant wife that I was facing a life-threatening illness.  It’s been a long two years since I found out I had Hepatitis C, and for those of you who are recent subscribers or new followers, you may want to read a few posts in order to come up to speed (I won’t re-post all the details here for obvious reasons).  Here’s my initial announcement, and then that was followed by  update #1, update #2, update #3, and update #4.  I have been amazed to discover the vast amount of people, all over the world, that have been praying for my family and myself through all this.  We’ve been totally floored at the overwhelming generosity of time and resources that we’ve received from all over as well.

It’s so strange to attempt to thank distant brothers and sisters in the Lord on a medium like this, but our family cannot adequately express our thanks to everyone that has supported us in prayer through this time and helped us keep persevering through the midst of what has been, at times, quite a severe burden.

Thank you all so very much; may the Lord repay you all with vast interest for all the love we’ve been shown.

Still, we’re not out of the woods and I need to call upon everyone for prayer once again.

Last week, I spent a day in Vancouver, BC at Vancouver General Hospital and got clearance to start my second round of anti-viral treatment.  It seems like my health insurance company has covered my additional medical expenses (though I still have nothing in unambiguous writing) and I’m now taking Sovaldi.  Our family would like to request 3 items for prayer:

1.  Please pray that this round of treatment works.  My previous round of less intense treatment didn’t produce any results, so we’re definitely praying that this round is far more effective.  The treatment regime I’m on could possibly eradicate my Hepatitis C completely, so we’d like to as you to join with us in petitioning the Lord unto that exact end.  I’d like to invite you to join me in asking and trusting the Lord for complete eradication of the Hepatitis C virus.  If this medication doesn’t work, I’m in line for a liver transplant and that’s, well, quite bad news (the waiting list is years, and my liver is not doing well at all…).

2.  Please pray for my precious wife (Jennifer) and two toddlers (Tobias & Kajsa).  This regime of treatment is quite intense, and the last round of less-intense treatment was amazingly difficult for my wife and family.  The side effects are uncertain (everyone responds differently) but last time I lost my memory, got really crabby (quite randomly too; the drugs are actually quite mind-altering), had basically no energy at all, and had a variety of other effects that made life rather difficult for myself and the rest of the family.  Please pray that my wife has extra patience, grace and endurance through this all.  She’s a far greater blessing than I deserve and has had a real tough go through this all.

3.  Please pray for my upcoming job search.  I’m trusting that the Lord will make this treatment regime effective, but healing will mean that after this all I can go back to work.  I’m going to be searching for ministry work during the next several months that I’m on treatment (and the months of recovery afterwards), and I am absolutely itching to get back to work…but I would rather not go back to my property maintenance job (it’s a great job, but it’s time for a career).  I’ve been talking with churches, off and on, but now I’m going to be seriously looking for ministry work.

The problem is that I live in Canada and I’m a theologically conservative/properly fundamentalist fella (in the historic sense) who is educated, fairly inexperienced, and in my late thirties.  I’m consistently told I’m “too old” to be a youth pastor, “too inexperienced” to be a senior pastor, “too educated” to be an associate and “too conservative” for all the churches that don’t care much about age, experience or education.  The Lord can grant me ministry work, but after talking with as many churches as I have talked with over the last several years, I’m under no delusions about just what an ostentatious act of providence it will be for me to end up working in a church somewhere.  I may end up filling a role in the body other than working in a local church (i.e. writing and speaking professionally), but the local church is where I’d love to be.

Over the next 3 months, I’ll be working on book ideas and probably blogging a bit on here and the Cripplegate (and possibly going nuts on one or two other projects that I imagine will surface), but I don’t really know what will be happening since I’m not really sure how bad the side effects of my treatment will be.

I’ll covet all your prayers and will deliver updates as information becomes available.

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “naming it but not claiming it” Unger

I wrote the following tonight as a response to a Facebook discussion, and since time is quite precious, I’ll post it here as well.  I’m learning to double-dip that way.

The post gave this quote :

“There is no vision, no experience, and no miracle that will tell you more about God than he has already told you about himself in the pages of scripture.”

The post then asked for responses, and there were plenty…but they weren’t as helpful as I would have hoped, which really disappointed me.  Facebook usually doesn’t let me down in this regard.  If I had a dime for every time I struggled to sort through a complex issue and found a consistent and well-reasoned argument or a piece of sage biblical wisdom on Facebook, I’d have…uh…about this much.

Here’s my response to the quote:

Q1.  Are miracles revelatory?

A1.  No.  Miracles aren’t revelatory at all, so a miracle cannot possible tell any new information about God.

Biblical example: Acts 2:1-11 – The Spirit is poured out on Jews from all over and they all speak in tongues.

What’s the response from the Jews?

Acts 2:12 – “And all were amazed and perplexed, saying to one another, “What does this mean?”

The miracle itself didn’t reveal any information, but the answer to the question in Acts 2:12 is found in Acts 2:14-36. That’s what it meant.

Again, Matthew 9 lays out the same concept.

In Matthew 9:1-5, Jesus sees a paralytic and says something rather astonishing in in 9:2 – “Take heart, my son; your sins are forgiven”. In fact, in 9:3 that statement of Jesus is called blasphemy. Jesus then recognized the difficulty of his pronouncement in Matt. 9:4-5 and in 9:6 says something interesting:

“but that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins”—he then said to the paralytic—“Rise, pick up your bed and go home.”

So again, the miracle only confirmed the claims of Christ. The miracle itself didn’t tell anyone anything.

One could say that they are God cracking his whip to get people to pay attention to something.

That means that miracles cannot even do what the quote suggests.

Q2: Do any religious experiences tell us more about God than is in the pages of scripture?

A2:  Not according to the apostle Peter.

In 2 Peter 1:16-21, Peter lays this out in detail

In 2 Peter 1:16-18 he recounts the transfiguration of Christ, where he (a Jew) saw both Moses and Elijah as well. As far as religious experiences go, that’s about as awesome as it gets.

Anyone got anything that tops seeing the glorified Christ along with Moses and Elijah?

No?

Okay. So then what was Peter’s response to that?

2 Peter 1:19 – “And we have the prophetic word more fully confirmed, to which you will do well to pay attention as to a lamp shining in a dark place, until the day dawns and the morning star rises in your hearts…”

Peter’s response was to direct the believers who received the letter to the scriptures, and not to trust him on the basis of his astonishing experiences.

Why?

2:Peter 1:20-21 – “knowing this first of all, that no prophecy of Scripture comes from someone’s own interpretation. For no prophecy was ever produced by the will of man, but men spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit.”

Because the scriptures are from God and Peter’s experience of God is less reliable. That’s why.

You can take a man’s testimony about God or you can take God’s testimony about God, but God is a far more reliable witness to himself than anyone else. He doesn’t need to call us to the stand to give our bumbling testimony.

That’s why we should let our experiences redirect us back to God’s word.

Seems like a no brainer when I say it that way, right?

Q3:  What about visions?

A3:  Well, that may be possible…

…though I’d point out a few things:

A. Their amazing infrequency in scripture.  The only vision in the gospels is in Luke 1:22, and there’s only 7 more in the rest of the NT (Acts. 9, 10, 12, 16, 18; 2 Cor. 12, Revelation – whole book). If you’re counting on a vision, you may wait for one once a decade (if you’re “spiritual” on the level of the apostles, seeing that only Cornelius and Zechariah are the only non-apostles in the NT to have any visions at all).

As for dreams, only Joseph (Matt. 1-2) and Pilate’s wife (Matt. 27:19) have revelations in dreams (and seeing that they’re regarding the birth and death of Christ, the significance of those two events in global history may give us a sense of WHEN God uses dreams…)

Good luck with that…

…except that’s not the end of the story.

B. The people who rely on them.

Colossians 2:18-19 warns about paying attention to visions: “Let no one disqualify you, insisting on asceticism and worship of angels, going on in detail about visions, puffed up without reason by his sensuous mind, and not holding fast to the Head, from whom the whole body, nourished and knit together through its joints and ligaments, grows with a growth that is from God.”

As for dreams, Jude 1:8 speaks of false teachers and says: “Yet in like manner these people also, relying on their dreams, defile the flesh, reject authority, and blaspheme the glorious ones.”

So we have false teachers/spiritual frauds being explicitly referred to as the people who focus on such things (and after the inaugural decade of the church, the only people spoken of as focusing on these things were false teachers), and visions and dreams being highly uncommon, occurring only at significant period of history (birth of Christ, death of Christ, first inclusion of the Gentiles into the church, etc.).  That makes them far more uncommon than many other rare occurrences.

Not exactly a recommendation for chasing dreams or visions.

I’d suggest that gives you more than ample reason to stay away, and not expect any new revelation via dreams.

But feel free to ignore the Bible. Most people who chase dreams, visions, religious experience and miracles already do.

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “I put the Dip in Double Dip” Unger

Over the last while, I’ve been truly amazed at just how many people I’ve discovered are praying for me around the world.  I’ve had lunch with people from other countries where they brought greetings and blessings from churches I’ve never been to, nor even heard about.  There’s a large thank-you coming (in some form) for everyone who has slugged with the Unger family in prayer over the last while, but I wanted to give an update as some new information has come in.

A recently had my viral load test done and got the results back, and the new drug that I’m on is working amazingly.  I’m not sure what the unit of measure is, but when I started the amount of Hepatitis C virus per volume was 4.1 million (basically, my blood was flooded with the virus).  My test results came in, and my viral load went from 4.1 million to 15.  Not 1.5 million, or 15 thousand, but just 15.

I’d dare say that’s a significant improvement and a massive answer to prayer.  It appears that the virus will be wiped out long before my treatment is over, but I won’t be declared “cured” until 6 months after the medication stops and I get a post-treatment viral load test.  Still, our hopes are high!

So, that’s most certainly fantastic news!

The Lord is mighty and glorious!

I’m off to bed now, but I wanted to just give a little update to everyone!

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “Losing my mind due to medication but singing praises none the less” Unger

P.S. – I didn’t make the picture.  Someone doesn’t know how to spell “Hallelujah”…?!?

Many years ago, when I started blogging, I was far less serious.  I didn’t spend a lot of time writing, didn’t spend much time editing or finding pictures to accent the post, and did share a lot of stupid and half-baked thoughts.

Some people would argue that this hasn’t changed, but I’m not much of a reliable critic of my own writing and cannot say.

I have included some silly stuff over the last while, but I haven’t posted something utterly stupid in a while (again, open for debate).

Now, as some of you know, I’m taking some fairly strong medication and it sometimes makes me crabby or depressed but at other times it magnifies my regular wacky sense of humor into something…else.  I was chatting with a friend online a while ago and talking about my search for work, then I shifted to talk about his search for work.  He’s a bit younger than me and hasn’t had a serious interview before (for a serious “career” job), so we started talking and preparing for an “adult” interview.  We talked about that for a while and then started talking about the actual interview and…well…it probably wasn’t the best advice I’ve ever given.  What’s even funnier is that my friend completely rolled with it, without missing a beat (I have some rather hilarious friends).  Here’s an excerpt of our conversation, right when it went into off the bushes, and believe it or not, it was all in real time, including the links.  What you read was about 5 minutes worth of “real time” conversation.  I copied and pasted it into a Word document at the moment, but going back, I don’t even remember the conversation or how I even found the links on the fly (I sometimes amaze myself…).

Me: and then on the day of your actual interview, you wear a frilly blouse top like a guy from the 1700’s.

Friend: yessss.

Friend: They’ll just have to hire me at that point.

Me:

Me: Walk into your interview like that.

Friend: perfect.

Friend: they’ll see my style and think “Wow, this guy is snazzy”.

Me: bring a picnic basket and offer your interviewer some wine and cheese.

Friend: should I wear a beret when serving wine and cheese.

Me: Totally.

Me: But talk with a Russian accent.

Friend: Just to keep them on their toes, yes.

Friend: I’ll slip some Japanese words into my speech, too.

Friend: To show them how knowledgeable I am.

Me: Yeah, perfect!   When the interview is done, give them a parting gift.

Me:

Friend: Is that a chocolate accordion?

Me: yeah.

Me: that’s CLASS!

Friend: That’s beautiful!

Me: They’d hire you just do see what you would do next.

Me: but it would certainly be the most memorable interview EVER.

Friend: This is the best ‘getting hired’ strategy ever.!

Friend: ever ever ever!!!

Me: Frilly blouse + picnic basket + Russian accent + chocolate accordions = instant hire!

Friend: Good, all according to plan.

Me: All accordioning to plan.

Friend: hahaha

Friend: Should I keep the blouse throughout the job– maybe change the color of it every so often?

Me: And then on your first day, hand out custom license plate frames to everyone.

Me:

Friend: wow

Friend: yes

Me: Blouse changes involve stripping, which is a faux pas in an interview…

Friend: I approve of this so much.

Friend: That is true.

Me: …But “honk if you love Garlic” plate frames are the perfect gift for the recent “most weird guy ever” hire.

Me: And if you want to change the blouse, you need to have on a shirt underneath for modesty sake.

Friend: What should the shirt say on it?

Me: just to add a layer…

Me: …and advertise a message

Me:

Me: And then ask your interviewer “do I smell something burning?” as you take off your blouse and change it to a different color.

Me: And look around, sniffing the air like you smell something.  Then take a sip of wine and gaze off into the distance.  Then mutter something in Japanese with a Russian accent.

Friend: hahaha

And after that all, I realized that the conversation had gone off into the realm of the crazy and was no longer really profitable.  I wished him a good night, told him I had to go to bed, and logged off.

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “What was I thinking?  No wait.  Was I thinking?” Unger

P.S. – Don’t ever do that in an interview.  Just saying.

P.P.S. – This isn’t a serious post (obviously), but I’ve had it in my draft folder for a while and wanted to toss something up to keep this blog slightly alive.  If not stimulating thought, I hope my drug-induced craziness at least entertains for a moment.

I’m obviously not blogging much these days.  The reason is two-fold:

1.  I’m editing a book and that is taking up all my available energy.

2.  I’m in my final two weeks of Hepatitis treatment and as the drugs accumulate in my system, life is getting rougher.  My energy levels are super low and don’t seem to get restored (due to the fact that I have very little hemoglobin, among other things).  I simply cannot sleep at night either (last night between 10pm and 8am I managed a little less than 4 hours of sleep).  I have a constant headache that never goes anywhere.  It’s going to get worse as the drugs build in my system, but then on about Dec. 22nd I’ll be done and they’ll slowly dissipate out of my system over the next six months.  I’m surviving well enough and don’t really have anything to complain about; all those things I mentioned are at the level of “inconvenience”.

I don’t want to sound like a whiner.  The Lord has been amazingly good these past 2 years and we’re surviving.  Our church has been really supportive (and I’ve probably not exactly been as outwardly thankful for that as I should be.  Thank you everyone at Valley Heights!).  The fundraiser that a dear friend from Grace Community Church put on for us kept our heads above water, financially speaking (and I am eventually going to thank her by finding a husband for her; it’s the least I could do!).  In the grand scheme of things, I have it pretty light.  I Still got all my limbs.  My kids are fine.  I live in a country that where I’ve been able to be sick for 2 years and I haven’t ended up living on the street (plus I had $100,000+ of medication paid for).

So, on Twitter, I’ve gone back and forth with the son of a man who has been rather strongly accused of teaching the prosperity gospel (and the son was commissioned to ministry by none other than Creflo Dollar, so maybe there’s some reason to suspect that the accusations might have a bit of merit).  The fellow that I’ve been interacting with eventually blocked me due to some arbitrary rule about Twitter etiquette (apparently if a person doesn’t respond to a tweet within a certain amount of time, they’re some sort of “bad guy”) and I was hoping to get him to offer forth his definition of the Prosperity Gospel.  Of course, he thinks that he’s the only one allowed to define it, and does so in a way that conveniently leaves room for his own teaching, but as I’ve been editing and adding some rather substantial footnotes, I found myself reading an old book by Kenneth Copeland.  I’d dare suggest that since the Pope sees Kenneth Copeland as the current spokesman for Protestantism, as well as one of the elder statesmen of the Prosperity Gospel circles, Kenneth Copeland is a decent enough authority on the idea of the Prosperity Gospel.  I wanted to share what will be part of a footnote, since it’s been over 2 weeks since I blogged anything:

Kenneth Copeland, The Laws of Prosperity (Fort Worth, TX: Kenneth Copeland Publications, 1976), Cited 9 December 2014. Online: (http://www.kcmcanada.ca/books/lawsofprosperity.pdf). In no uncertain terms, Kenneth Copeland sets up the prosperity gospel as “good news”about a second tier of Christian spirituality as opposed to “good news” about the cross or the resurrection.

 Copeland writes ” there is spiritual prosperity; there is mental prosperity; and there is physical prosperity” (Copeland, 10). He explains spiritual prosperity when he writes ” To prosper spiritually, you must be born again. When you accept Jesus as your Savior and make Him the Lord of your life, your spirit is reborn and brought into fellowship with the Father, the Almighty God. This then puts you in a position to receive from Him all the things promised in His Word” (Ibid). He then explains mental prosperity when he writes:

 “Prosperity of the mind comes when you use the knowledge that has been accumulated—when you are controlling your mind instead of your mind controlling you. Second Corinthians 10:5 says we are to cast down imaginations and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God (or against the Word of God), bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ. The person who does this has control of his mind and is in position to prosper mentally. You cannot control your mind completely without the Word of God being alive and operating inside you.

You must control your will in the same way. Some people say, “Lord, help my will to crumble.” God doesn’t want a broken will that He can dominate. He wants your will whole and in submission to His will so that the two of you can work together in unity. When God made man, He gave him a will that has power. It is actually a godlike will because man has the right to choose his own eternal destiny. Only a god has that kind of choice! Man was made in God’s image and given the will to make up his own mind. You can go to hell if you want to and God will protect your right…you don’t have to, but you can. On the other hand, you can choose Jesus Christ and the Word of God.” (Copeland, 10-11)

Then, Copeland explains the relation between mental and physical prosperity when he writes:

 “The world’s definition of physical prosperity (prosperity of the senses) includes gold, silver, financial favor or power, political favor or power and social favor or power. The world’s definition of mental prosperity (prosperity of the soul) is “knowing it all.” Put these two ideas together and you have a person who can use his mind to get financial and political power. This is the world’s total concept of prosperity. You can easily see its drawbacks! Wealth and power cannot answer every problem. Money makes a lousy god! It can’t buy good health or prevent sickness and disease from taking over the human body. Yes, it can go toward buying it, but the world’s system of healing just isn’t good enough. In the mental realm, a person can have all the facts in his head and not have the ability to use that knowledge to obtain the money or the health that he needs.

What produces spiritual, mental and physical prosperity? What brings all these areas together? The Word of God. The Bible says in Hebrews 4:12 that the Word is alive, powerful and sharper than a two-edged sword. It says that it divides the soul and the spirit, the joints and the marrow, and that it is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. When you are walking in the Word of God, you will prosper and be in health” (Copeland, 11-12)

So the basic idea is that spiritual prosperity is getting “in position” to have fellowship with God and receive what he wants to give you, and mental prosperity is essentially learning to “line up your will with God’s will”, meaning thinking the right sort of “positive confession” thoughts (i.e. “I’m a little God” or “my words have power to create”). Then, once you’re fully brainwashed with pagan theology and ready to willingly twist scripture, you can take all the Old Testament promises about Old Covenant blessings, or any scripture related to money that you can twist, and apply them to yourself in order to get money, favor or power.

This is what Kenneth Copeland has taught for decades. This is what is explicitly taught by the largest “church” in the United States and Canada.

Just some thoughts about the prosperity gospel.

Some Charismatics, like Michael Brown and Craig Keener, have portrayed the Prosperity Gospel as “Jesus died so that you can have money”.  That’s simply a smokescreen to portray the prevalence of the Prosperity Gospel as only a component of the “lunatic fringe” since nobody on planet earth, outside of a handful of completely insane people, teaches something so blatantly heretical.

Also, if you’re going to critique someone as a prosperity preacher, do so accurately.  The fact that people are heretics doesn’t give license for believers to lie about them or misrepresent what they teach.

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “Getting the Prosperity Gospel Right” Unger

I was up a few nights ago, having a rather unconquerable bout of insomnia (my medication loves me, but it’s a rather tough love) and I found myself reading The Life of President Edwards by Sereno Edwards Dwight.  I’ve referenced this book before, but I returned to it and was reading Sarah Edwards’ account of the revival in Northampton when she had some rather overwhelming experiences of God.  For those who read this blog, you’ll know that I don’t tend to reblog or just post quotes from famous theologians on here (I prefer offering original content seeing that there are more than a few “quote” bloggers out there), so this is a distinct change for me.  Still, I wrote out several pages of a quote and found myself reflecting upon it.  I don’t necessarily expect many readers to be as interested in this as I am, but this is my blog and I regularly use it as a “digital filing cabinet” as such for various things I want to remember.  Here’s a rather long quote, taken from pages 172-178 of The Life of President Edwards:

While Mr. Reynolds was at prayer in the family this morning, I felt an earnest desire that, in calling on God, he should say, Father, or that he should address the Almighty under that appellation: on which the thought turned in my mind—Why can I say, Father? —Can I now at this time, with the confidence of a child, and without the least misgiving of heart, call God my Father?—This brought to my mind, two lines of Mr. Erskine’s Sonnet:

“I see him lay his vengeance by,
“And smile in Jesus” face.”

I was thus deeply sensible, that my sins did loudly call for vengeance; but I then by faith saw God “lay his vengeance by, and smile in Jesus’ face.” It appeared to be real and certain that he did so. I had not the least doubt, that he then sweetly smiled upon me, with the look of forgiveness and love, having laid aside all his displeasure towards me, for Jesus’ sake; which made me feel very weak, and somewhat faint.

In consequence of this, I felt a strong desire to be alone with God, to go to him, without having any one to interrupt the silent and soft communion, which I earnestly desired between God and my own soul; and accordingly withdrew to my chamber. It should have been mentioned that, before I retired, while Mr. Reynolds was praying, these words, in Rom. viii. 34, came into my mind “Who is he that condemneth; It is Christ that died, yea rather that is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also maketh intercession for us;” as well as the following words, “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ,” etc.; which occasioned great sweetness and delight in my soul.

But when I was alone, the words came to my mind with far greater power and sweetness; upon which I took the Bible, and read the words to the end of the chapter, when they were impressed on my heart with vastly greater power and sweetness still. They appeared to me with undoubted certainty as the words of God, and as words which God did pronounce concerning me. I had no more doubt of it, than I had of my being. I seemed as it were to hear the great God proclaiming thus to the world concerning me; “Who shall lay any thing to thy charge” etc. ; and had it strongly impressed on me, how impossible it was for any thing in heaven or earth, in this world or the future, ever to separate me from the love of God which was in Christ Jesus. I cannot find language to express, how certain this appeared—the everlasting mountains and hills were but shadows to it. My safety, and happiness, and eternal enjoyment of God’s immutable love, seemed as durable and unchangeable as God himself. Melted and overcome by the sweetness of this assurance, I fell into a great flow of tears, and could not forbear weeping aloud. It appeared certain to me that God was my Father, and Christ my Lord and Saviour, that he was mine and I his. Under a delightful sense of the immediate presence and love of God, these words seemed to come over and over in my mind, “My God, my all; my God, my all.” The presence of God was so near, and so real, that I seemed scarcely conscious of any thing else. God the Father, and the Lord Jesus Christ, seemed as distinct persons, both manifesting their inconceivable loveliness, and mildness, and gentleness, and their great and immutable love to me. I seemed to be taken under the care and charge of my God and Saviour, in an inexpressibly endearing manner; and Christ appeared to me as a mighty Saviour, under the character of the Lion of the Tribe of Judah, taking my heart, with all its corruptions, under his care and putting it at his feet. In all things, which concerned me, I felt myself safe under the protection of the Father and the Saviour; who appeared with supreme kindness to keep a record of every thing that I did, and of every thing that was done to me, purely for my good.

The peace and happiness, which I hereupon felt, was altogether inexpressible. It seemed to be that which came from heaven; to be eternal and unchangeable. I seemed to be lifted above earth and hell, out of the reach of every thing here below, so that I could look on all the rage and enmity of men or devils, with a kind of holy indifference, and an undisturbed tranquility. At the same time, I felt compassion and love for all mankind, and a deep abasement of soul, under a sense of my own unworthiness, I thought of the ministers who were in the house, and felt willing to undergo any labour and self-denial, if they would but come to the help of the Lord. I also felt myself more perfectly weaned from all things here below, than ever before. The whole world, with all its enjoyments, and all its troubles, seemed to be nothing :—My God was my all, my only portion. No possible suffering appeared to be worth regarding : all persecutions and torments were a mere nothing. I seemed to dwell on high, and the place of defense to be the munition of rocks.

After some time, the two evils mentioned above, as those which I should have been least able to bear, came to my mind—the ill treatment of the town, and the ill will of my husband; but now I was carried exceedingly above even such things as these, and I could feel that, if I were exposed to them both, they would seem comparatively nothing. There was then a deep snow on the ground, and I could think of being driven from my home into the cold and snow, of being chased from the town with the utmost contempt and malice, and of being left to perish with the cold, as cast out by all the world, with perfect calmness and serenity. It appeared to me, that it would not move me, or in the least disturb the inexpressible happiness and peace of my soul. My mind seemed as much above all such things, as the sun is above the earth.

I continued in a very sweet and lively sense of divine things, day and night, sleeping and waking, until Saturday, Jan. 23. On Saturday morning, I had a most solemn and deep impression on my mind of the eye of God as fixed upon me, to observe what improvement I made of those spiritual communications I had received from him ; as well as of the respect shown Mr. Edwards, who had then been sent for to preach at Leicester. I was sensible that I was sinful enough to bestow it on my pride, or on my sloth, which seemed exceedingly dreadful to me. At night, my soul seemed to be filled with an inexpressibly sweet and pure love to God, and to the children of God ; with a refreshing consolation and solace of soul, which made me willing to lie on the earth, at the feet of the servants of God, to declare his gracious dealings with me, and breathe forth before diem my love, and gratitude and praise.

The next day, which was the Sabbath, I enjoyed a sweet, and lively and assured sense of God’s infinite grace, and favour and love to me, in taking me out of the depths of hell, and exalting me to the heavenly glory, and the dignity of a royal priesthood.

On Monday night, Mr. Edwards, being gone that day to Leicester, I heard that Mr. Buell was coming to this town, and from what I had heard of him, and of his success, I had strong hopes that there would be great effects from his labours here. At the same time, I had a deep and affecting impression, that the eye of God was ever upon my heart, and that it greatly concerned me to watch my heart, and see to it that I was perfectly resigned to God, with respect to the instruments he should make use of to revive religion in this town, and be entirely willing, if it was God’s pleasure, that he should make use of Mr. Buell; and also that other christians should appear to excel me in christian experience, and in the benefit they should derive from ministers. I was conscious, that it would be exceedingly provoking to God if I should not be thus resigned, and earnestly endeavoured to watch my heart, that no feelings of a contrary nature might arise; and was enabled, as I thought, to exercise full resignation, and acquiescence in God’s pleasure, as to these things. I was sensible what great cause I had to bless God, for the use he had made of Mr. Edwards hitherto; but thought, if he never blessed his labours any more, and should greatly bless the labours of other ministers, I could entirely acquiesce in his will. It appeared to me meet and proper, that God should employ babes and sucklings to advance his kingdom. When 1 thought of these things, it was my instinctive feeling to say, “Amen, Lord Jesus ! Amen, Lord Jesus!” This seemed to be the sweet and instinctive language of my soul.

On Tuesday, I remained in a sweet and lively exercise of this resignation, and love to and rest in God, seeming to be in my heart from day to day, far above the reach of every thing here below. On Tuesday night, especially the latter part of it, I felt a great earnestness of soul and engagedness in seeking God for the town, that religion might now revive, and that God would bless Mr. Buell to that end. God seemed to be very near to me while I was thus striving with him for these things, and I had a strong hope that what I sought of him would be granted. There seemed naturally and unavoidably to arise in my mind an assurance, that now God would do great things for Northampton.

On Wednesday morning, I heard that Mr. Buell arrived the night before at Mr. Phelps’s, and that there seemed to be great tokens and effects of the presence of God there, which greatly encouraged, and rejoiced me. About an hour and a half after, Mr. Buell came to our house, I sat still in entire resignedness to God, and willingness that God should bless his labours here as much as he pleased; though it were to the enlivening of every saint, and to the conversion of every sinner, in the town. These feelings continued afterwards, when I saw his great success; as I never felt the least rising of heart to the contrary, but my submission was even and uniform, without interruption or disturbance. I rejoiced when I saw the honour which God put upon him, and the respect paid him by the people, and the greater success attending his preaching, than had followed the preaching of Mr. Edwards immediately before he went to Leicester. I found rest and rejoicing in it, and the sweet language of my soul continually was, “Amen, Lord Jesus! Amen, Lord Jesus!”

At 3 o’clock in the afternoon, a lecture was preached by Mr. Buell. In the latter part of the sermon, one or two appeared much moved, and after the blessing, when the people were going out, several others. To my mind there was the clearest evidence, that God was present in the congregation, on the work of redeeming love; and in the clear view of this, I was all at once filled with such intense admiration of the wonderful condescension and grace of God, in returning again to Northampton, as overwhelmed my soul, and immediately took away my bodily strength. This was accompanied with an earnest longing, that those of us, who were the children of God, might now arise and strive. It appeared to me, that the angels in heaven sung praises, for such wonderful, free and sovereign grace, and my heart was lifted up in adoration and praise. I continued to have clear views of the future world, of eternal happiness and misery, and my heart full of love to the souls of men. On seeing some, that I found were in a natural condition, I felt a most tender compassion for them; but especially was I, while I remained in the meeting-house, from time to time overcome, and my strength taken away, by the sight of one and another, Whom I regarded as the children of God, and who, I had heard were lively and animated in religion. We remained in the meeting-house about three hours, after the public exercises were over. During most of the time, my bodily strength was overcome; and the joy and thankfulness, which were excited in my mind, as I contemplated the great goodness of God, led me to converse with those who were near me, in a very earnest manner.

When I came home, I found Mr. Buell, Mr. Christophers, Mr. Hopkins, Mrs. Eleanor Dwight, the wife of Mr. Joseph Allen, and Mr. Job Strong, at the house. Seeing and conversing with them on the Divine goodness, renewed my former feelings, and filled me with an intense desire that we might all arise, and, with an active, flowing and fervent heart, give glory to God. The intenseness of my feelings again took away my bodily strength. The words of one of Dr. Watts’s Hosannas powerfully affected me; and, in the course of the conversation, I uttered them, as the real language of my heart, with great earnestness and emotion.

“Hosanna to King David’s Son,
“Who reigns on a superior throne,” &c.

 And while I was uttering the words, my mind was so deeply impressed with the love of Christ, and a sense of his immediate presence, that I could with difficulty refrain from rising from my seat, and leaping for joy. I continued to enjoy this intense, and lively and refreshing sense of Divine things, accompanied with strong emotions, for nearly an hour; after which, I experienced a delightful calm, and peace and rest in God, until I retired for the night; and during the night, both waking and sleeping, I had joyful views of Divine things, and a complacential rest of soul in God. I awoke in the morning of Thursday, June 28th, in the same happy frame of mind, and engaged in the duties of my family with a sweet consciousness, that God was present with me, and with earnest longings of soul for the continuance, and increase, of the blessed fruits of the Holy Spirit in the town. About nine o’clock, these desires became so exceedingly intense, when I saw numbers of the people coming into the house, with an appearance of deep interest in religion, that my bodily strength was much weakened, and it was with difficulty that I could pursue my ordinary avocations. About 11 o’clock, as I accidentally went into the room where Mr. Buell was conversing with some of the people, I heard him say, “O that we, who are the children of God, should be cold and lifeless in religion!” and I felt such a sense of the deep ingratitude manifested by the children of God, in such coldness and deadness, that my strength was immediately taken away, and I sunk down on the spot. Those who were near raised me, and placed me in a chair; and, from the fulness of my heart, I expressed to them, in a very earnest manner, the deep sense I had of the wonderful grace of Christ towards me, of the assurance I had of his having saved me from hell, of my happiness running parallel with eternity, of the duty of giving up all to God, and of the peace and joy inspired by an entire dependence on his mercy and grace. Mr. Buell then read a melting hymn of Dr. Watts, concerning the loveliness of Christ, the enjoyments and employments of heaven, and the christian’s earnest desire of heavenly things; and the truth and reality of the things mentioned in the hymn, made so strong an impression on my mind, and my soul was drawn so powerfully towards Christ and heaven, that I leaped unconsciously from my chair. I seemed to be drawn upwards, soul and body, from the earth towards heaven; and it appeared to me that I must naturally and necessarily ascend thither. These feelings continued while the hymn was reading, and during the prayer of Mr. Christophers, which followed. After the prayer, Mr. Buell read two other hymns, on the glories of heaven, which moved me so exceedingly, and drew me so strongly heavenward, that it seemed as it were to draw my body upwards, and I felt as if I must necessarily ascend thither. At length my strength failed me, and I sunk down; when they took me up and laid me on the bed, where I lay for a considerable time, faint with joy, while contemplating the glories of the heavenly world. After I had lain a while, I felt more perfectly subdued and weaned from the world, and more fully resigned to God, than I had ever been conscious of before. I felt an entire indifference to the opinions, and representations and conduct of mankind respecting me; and a perfect willingness, that God should employ some other instrument than Mr. Edwards, in advancing the work of grace in Northampton. I was entirely swallowed up in God, as my only portion, and his honour and glory was the object of my supreme desire and delight. At the same time, I felt a far greater love to the children of God, than ever before. I seemed to love them as my own soul; and when I saw them, my heart went out towards them, with an inexpressible endearedness and sweetness. I beheld them by faith in their risen and glorified state, with spiritual bodies re-fashioned after the image of Christ’s glorious body, and arrayed in the beauty of heaven. The time when they would be so, appeared very near, and by faith it seemed as if it were present. This was accompanied with a ravishing sense of the unspeakable joys of the upper world. They appeared to my mind in all their reality and certainty, and as it were in actual and distinct vision; so plain and evident were they to the eye of my faith, I seemed to regard them as begun. These anticipations were renewed over and over, while I lay on the bed, from twelve o’clock till four, being too much exhausted by emotions of joy, to rise and sit up; and during most of the time, my feelings prompted me to converse very earnestly, with one and another of the pious women, who were present, on those spiritual and heavenly objects, of which I had so deep an impression. A little while before I arose, Mr. Buell and the people went to meeting.

In reflecting upon the “manifestation” of the Spirit in the life of Sarah Edwards, it was strange in that it was both emotionally overwhelming but also quite simple: she was meditating on the scripture and the Spirit energized the word in her heart, bringing a deep conviction of the truth therein.  As well, she rooted her emotional response in very specific texts of scripture and found herself unable to refrain from discussing, with great joy, the specific texts of scripture and thoughts related that were filling her mind.

When you study the scripture and pour over the meaning of various specific texts of scripture, it should grasp your heart and affect you towards the cultivation of belief and conviction regarding the truth of the scripture.

May the Lord do so in us all.

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “seeking true revival” Unger

Well, a few hours ago I took my last dose of Ribavirin and this morning I took my final pill of Sofosbuvir.  Three months of taking daily doses of heavy duty medication is finally done, and now my body is as loaded as it will ever be with drugs.  The saturation of the drugs has increased as I’ve gone through the last three months, and now it will take six months for everything to finally clear out.

People always ask me if I’m feeling better.  Truth is, I’m feeling pretty horrible.  I’m getting better but feeling worse, though the “feeling” will soon start to coincide” with with “getting”.  The side effects of Sofosbuvir are things like insomnia, headaches, loss of energy, brain fog, etc. and the Ribavirin has side effects of it’s own (nausea, dry skin like crazy, etc.).  I’m definitely rolling on all fronts, meaning that I haven’t had more than five hours of sleep per night in the last three weeks, I have had a headache going on a month, have about as much energy as a coma-patient, etc.  I definitely still will covet continuation of all the faithful prayers I’ve been receiving…and want to thank all the thousands of people around the world that have been praying for me over these last two years.  The end is somewhat in sight now, and I cannot wait to be get back to “regular life”.

I get a viral load (to see if there’s any detectable Hepatitis C in my blood) tomorrow and won’t get the results for several days, and then I’ll get another viral load in three months and six months.  When the results of the six month viral load test come back, I’ll be officially declared “cured”.  Until then, there is a (ever-so-remote) possibility that Hepatitis C may somehow be hiding out in the dark corners of my body.

Our family isn’t really having Christmas this year as we’re all so horribly exhausted from this ordeal.  We’re thankful that the kids are too young to remember anything, and we’ll still see friends and some family over the holidays and have Christmas festivities, food and decorations vicariously through them.

Please remember to lift up my wife in prayer.  She’s struggling with what I call “sympathy insomnia” (which most likely means that I wake her up when I get up), and having three toddlers to take care of has worn her down to the point that she really needs a vacation from life.  She’s soldiering on, but she’s at the point now where it’s fairly easy to depend on the Lord since there’s absolutely no “self” left.  That’s a somewhat scary place to be though.

Also, please remember to pray for our two little ones.  Dad has a short fuse these days and get snappy at them, which breaks dad’s heart and make the house tense sometimes (or leads to increased misbehavior as dad gets emulated against his will).  Also, dad is really too tired to do much of anything with the little ones, so that makes like difficult for them.

Hopefully the Lord will grant me a swift and decisive return to energy and the ability to sleep through the night soon.

Thank you again for all your prayers, and have a blessed and Merry Christmas!

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “Still going but not sure why” Unger

P.S. – I’m still editing the book, but it’s proving slow and difficult with my brain fog and sleepiness.  I’ve got Grammarly to help me now, and that’s helping.  Still, if it weren’t for my current state, the book would have been done weeks ago.

Wait.  What?

Christmas Apocalypse?

Oh goodness.  Of all the idiotic ways to try to make Christmas “relevant” …

I know what you’re thinking: “Unger has lost it, and his meds have final fried his frontal lobe.”

Well, I don’t think that’s quite the scenario, but now that I have your attention let’s look at Luke 2:22-35!

In Luke 2:22-35, there is the pericope of Jesus being brought to the temple as a baby. Luke 2:22-24 sets up the account with Mary and Joseph, being the upstanding observant Jews that they were, bringing their son to be purified and presented to the Lord as was required by the law of Moses. They had to sacrifice two turtledoves (isn’t that in a Christmas song somewhere?) and were diligent in fulfilling their duties, seeing that Joseph was an upright man.

When they got to the temple, they encountered a man named Simeon. He was a righteous and devout Jewish man who was awaiting the “consolation of Israel”, seeing that God had revealed to him that he would not “not see death before he had seen the Lord’s Christ”; the Lord’s anointed one (Luke 2:25-26). When Simeon came into the temple, filled with the Spirit, he saw Jesus, picked him up (Luke 2:27) and prophetically delivered a  short, three couplet poem (Luke 2:28):

“Lord, now you are letting your servant depart in peace, according to your word; (Luke 2:29)

for my eyes have seen your salvation that you have prepared in the presence of all peoples, (Luke 2:30-31)

a light for revelation to the Gentiles, and for glory to your people Israel.” (Luke 2:32)

Looking at the couplets, one sees some very interesting stuff prophetically coming out of Simeon’s mouth:

In the first couplet, Simeon talks about the Lord releasing him (to see death) in peace, according to the Lord’s word.  It’s interesting how Simeon talks about being “released” to die, which gives a little understanding of how Simeon recognizes that the Lord is the one who brings life and death. A person doesn’t die until the Lord decides that it’s time for life to “release” them.

It’s also interesting how Simeon knew that he would “not see death before he had seen the Lord’s Christ” (Luke 2:26) because the Lord had directly told him so.  The “word” that the Lord had given him wasn’t a general word (logos), but rather a personal propositional statement (rhema) directly given to him by means of the Spirit.  God was keeping his promise in exactly the way that God had personally said he would…and God never breaks his promises.   Ever.

In the second couplet, Simeon explains why the first couplet is so.  Before Simeon’s eyes were allowed to see death, his eyes had to see the “consolation of Israel” (Luke 2:25) and that’s exactly what they did.  It’s interesting that Simeon refers to Jesus as the “your salvation”, meaning God’s means of salvation for Israel.  He talks about Jesus in somewhat sub-personal terms here, not because he doesn’t realize that Jesus is a person but rather because he sees Jesus for what he will do.  In a sense, Jesus is the means to the end of bringing salvation to Israel, but in another sense, he is the salvation of Israel.  He is that salvation incarnated.  Jesus is the means and the end at the same time.

It’s also interesting how the Spirit speaking through Simeon words the next phrase.  The choice of words is subtle, yet incredibly profound.  The verb “see” (orao) comes up repeatedly in the previous verses.  Simeon was promised that he would “see” (orao) the Lord’s salvation (Luke 2:26) and Simeon did see (orao) him (Luke 2:30).  Then, Simeon says that the Lord’s salvation had been prepared in the presence (pros + orao), or before the eyes of, all people.  Not only has Simeon got to see it, but everyone gets to see it.  God’s promise keeping to Simeon (among many, many other people to whom God made messianic promises) is on full display in Jesus, before the eyes of the whole world.

In the third couplet there is language that describes this “salvation” that had been prepared before the eyes of everyone.  Who is this little child that Simeon holds?  The Spirit speaking through Simeon says two amazing things.

1. This child is “a light for revelation to the Gentiles”.  Quite literally, Simeon says that Jesus is a light (“light” in the sense that he made something “see-able”) for/into apocalupsis, a term that means to unveil or disclose something.  When we see the Greek term apocalupsis, it comes into English as apocalypse.  Christmas is a time when God unveiled himself to the Gentiles by shining a spotlight on himself in the form of the child, Jesus Christ.  The beginning of Christ’s incarnation was a time of apocalypse, and God’s plan of salvation (and God himself) was revealed before the unknowing eyes of the entire world.  Little did they know, but never should we forget.
2. This child is a light “for glory to your people Israel.”  Jesus didn’t just reveal God himself to the Gentiles, but Jesus also shone a spotlight on God’s glory for Israel, his people.  Christ was God’s glory, on public and rather ostentatious display for a limited time, in Israel.  Jesus was God’s personal effort at radiating forth his own perfections, in the sight of his own people, in a very purposeful and unprecedented way.

With all of that being said, it’s no surprise that Mary and Joseph were struck with amazement at what was said about their little son (2:33).  They knew Jesus was special, but up until now in Luke’s gospel they were only told that Jesus was the promised Davidic king (Luke 1:31) who would be conceived directly by the power of the Holy Spirit (Luke 1:35) and would fulfill the promises to Abraham (Luke 1:54-55 & all three points are again repeated in Luke 1:68-74).  These three couplets spoken through Simeon by the Spirit were so much for Mary and Joseph to grasp that they were simply struck with wonder, unsure as to what exactly Simeon’s prophecy meant.  Such high and lofty language and such overtly extravagant talk was just a little much for the humble little couple to swallow…but that’s sort of the point, right?

Christ is God’s salvation, put forth before everyone’s eyes, to illumine God’s self-revelation and glory.  That’s a big part of what Christmas is about, and good reason to be bold about talking about those things this holiday season.

Quite literally, discussing God and his glory is the reason for the season.

The prophet Luke said it, not me.

Merry Christmas and Let er’ Rip.

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “Speaking of the zombie apocalypse…did you ever hear about the Jesus apocalypse?” Unger

(Okay.  Now that’s an idiotic sounding way of trying to be relevant.  I couldn’t resist a lame joke.)

P.S. – This post is also in the queue on the Cripplegate, but it may or may not be posted before Christmas (depending on if they need a post; due to my meds I’m on “irregular rotation” there now).  Either way, my faithful readers always get the good stuff here first!

I just got the statistics in from my blogging year.  This year was a big year for me, with my blog traffic increasing rather exponentially over previous years due to my whole involvement in the Strange Fire conference and aftermath.  I had written a blog post this morning (on something totally unrelated to blog stats) and was about to post it, but WordPress threw it into the ether and I lost everything (I know, draft on Word…the one time I don’t…doh).  So, I was all bummed today.  My mood just picked up though as I got the stats in from the Cripplegate and learned that I had the #1 post on there for 2014, with this post receiving 24,000+ views.  Thanks to all my readers!

Then I was curious about this blog and I looked at my own analytics.  I realized that my review of the Noah movie was my most trafficked post by far, with 52,000 views.  For comparison my second place post was, strangely, my 207-word post about Jentezen Franklin and Tommy Tenney that got 3,500 views.  Also, three of my top ten posts were the movie reviews (God’s Not Dead and Left Behind) I did this year.  I guess that means that people like my crabby movie reviews.

I’m sad that I was far too sick to see Exodus: Gods & Kings, but maybe I’ll do some more movie reviews next year.  I’m still editing the Authentic Fire response book, and I have a second far smaller book on the horizon, but then I’ll be preparing for the conference that I’ll be speaking at in April.  I’ll try to have a few posts up from time to time, but as I come to the end of my period of sickness and get back to work in the next few months, my blogging will slow down and this blog will become significantly less active than it has over the past few years.  I have a few projects on the go and will do my best to toss some half decent stuff up from time to time.  There are lots of thoughts that I have which still have to come out!

Thanks to all the new readers I’ve picked up this past year and may the Lord grant you all a happy new year!

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “Mennoknight” Unger

Also, this morning I was essentially blogging about some comedy associated with this crazy video.

Enjoy the video!  Happy New Year!

If you follow this blog at all, you know that I’ve been a rather sickly boy for the last while.  That’s especially true with this past month and a bit, as my medication has been taking me to the cleaners rather full bore.  I have had trouble sleeping, concentrating, remembering, and not being rather crabby at times.  Still, through it all I’ve been slowly chipping away at the edits for the Authentic Fire review book that Fred Butler and I are putting together.  Fred and I have been re-packaging our content and beefing it up, rather significantly.  I’m guessing that by the time the book is done it will be over 200 pages, and I’ve added at least 30 pages of new material.  Fred has been rather amazingly patient with me through this all, getting updates every few weeks and having me being the one who is holding up progress on finishing everything.  One day, I’ll definitely have to buy that man a steak.

That’s probably not the best image to have after the first one.

Fred Butler has already leaked something from the book in order to wet some appetites, and now I have something of my own to toss out.  I had a goofy idea that spiraled into something rather crazy (as often happens with me).  I was thinking about the typical Charismatic proofs for modern manifestations of sign gifts (namely tongues, prophecy and healing) and how a majority of the “evidence” given as proofs is testimonial evidence rather than biblical exegesis.  All of a sudden was singing some lyrics along those lines in my head…to the tune of the William Tell Overture.

That’s right.

The theme song to the Lone Ranger.

I have absolutely no idea why.

Here’s the song for those of you who aren’t that familiar with it:

Here’s a sneak peak at part of the lyrics that I came up with (the full score will be part of the final end-note in chapter 11 of the book):

Here’s a tale, here’s a tale, here’s another tale!
Here’s a tale, here’s a tale, here’s another tale!
Here’s a tale, here’s a tale, here’s another tale!
What a WHAAAAALE of a sign gift tale!

Overseas, in ’03, I prayed for a knee.
It was sore, the guy swore, for a month or more!
But I prayed, God gave aid, in my big crusade,
All the SKEEEEEPTICS saw God’s power displayed!

Don’t ask where, I forget, but I know that it was in a country overseas.
Don’t’ ask who, I don’t know, since I healed a lot of people’s rather damaged knees.
There’s a guy, if I try, I can get him to track down someone to verify.
If I call on a phone, I can see if there’s a video that can be shown.

I suggest that you don’t get hopes up, because it, might be erased.
But I hope that it’s still around so, I can put, you in your place.

Here’s a tale, here’s a tale, here’s another tale!
Here’s a tale, here’s a tale, here’s another tale!
Here’s a tale, here’s a tale, here’s another tale!
What a WHAAAAALE of a sign gift tale!

And so on…  It goes on and becomes rather the tongue twister around 1:10-1:22, but you’ll have to actually pick up the book to get the full lyrics.  Where else can you get such high quality Cessationist comedy?

Tremendous thanks goes out to everyone who has upheld me in prayer as I’ve slogged through this project, a few hours at a time, in the early mornings as I’ve been bludgeoned with drug-induced insomnia.  If I were feeling better I’d be probably done long ago, but it’s slow going since I haven’t been feeling like myself for a while.

Either way, I’ve got 1 chapter left of major edits and then I’ll send it to my proof-reader for a final examination.  Hopefully, this will all be done relatively soon.

Until Next Time,

Lyndon “The Stoned Ranger” Unger